Nothing good to report

Just more depression, crying, not understanding why it won't get better.  it's just a downward spiral into nothing good.  i feel worthless, like a failure, my husband says it can't be all his fault that our marriage has focused on him since i've never had any goals, but when i set a goal for school that got shunted to the side becuase i had to go back to work again, i want to work on my art and my blogs and crafts, but that doesn't make money, so i can't do that, which makes me feel even more like a paycheck, like i just need to suck it up and deal with it.  i don't know how i will get out of bed tomorrow, i haven't gotten up in days, my needs aren't listened to, i tell my husband i don't want friends over and he invites them over anyway, i'm trying to be a good sport but it just makes me feel like my wants and needs are nothing, that whatever he wants, whatever he thinks we should be doing or eating or whatever is the right way and i have no say in it, just suck it up, go to work so i can go to school, i don't know what to do or how to manage anything, i have no idea if i will be fired tomorrow for having taken the whole previous week off and my doc note only covers one of those days, it's just spiraling out of control, i know i could find another job, but why bother, why bother with anything, what's the point, just to watch someone else achieve their goals off you sweat and blood, i wish i could just disappear, hide away from everything and be left alone, no more reports due, no more bosses that yell for no reason, no more husbands demanding i get up and go to work, no more anything, i  just want to be left alone